Our dining room is now a classroom. Yay 2020!

I’ve been hearing it since March: “Virtual learning sucks! My kids can’t concentrate. I can’t get any work done!” I sympathized but was lucky as both of my kids were still in daycare, being cared for in a safe environment so I could continue working in peace, leading conference calls on Webex without interruption, finishing projects under ridiculously tight deadlines.

That was until this week. Ruby, my smart, sassy five year old started virtual kindergarten. We moved to this area four years ago so that we could take advantage of the amazing schools we have at our disposal, one of which (the elementary school) is right across from our house. I can see the building now. However, 2020 is determined to fuck up all of our plans and, for now, her classroom is at our dining room table.

8:00 a.m. on Monday arrived with a bang: the server crashed. Nobody could get into the system. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that 13,000 people were all trying to log on at the same time and all I kept thinking was, “Why the FUCK didn’t they anticipate this and buy more servers?!?!” I recognized Ruby’s eyes wandering, the sense of boredom, her starting to lose focus and I was panicking. NOT TO MENTION I also had my own work to do and finally it clicked:

Fucking A, THIS is why parents have been losing their goddamn minds for the past five months!

Finally, at 8:45 we got in, Ruby saw that five other kids from her class at daycare were in her Kindergarten class and she was ecstatic. She showed off her new Harry Potter t-shirt, her friend showed off the bruise on her head that she got the day before…these are the things five year olds take pride in!

I also had sympathy for Ruby’s lovely new teacher who obviously had been thrown in at the deep end with this and was tasked with keeping 10 kids focused when they weren’t directly in front of her. Teachers need to be paid six figure salaries, ESPECIALLY as they’re required to all get masters degrees before they are allowed to teach. I need to figure out how to make this happen…

Here’s the thing though. In the multiple communications that went out in the weeks leading up to this, no one mentioned that Kindergarten classes would stop at noon every day and that there wouldn’t be any class on Wednesdays. That’s right, IT WASN’T MENTIONED. This has left a lot of us parents who are working to figure out alternate schedules at the last minute. I have to figure out how to stop Ruby from leaving her “class” to come and hug me every five minutes while I’m on a conference call.

#things that we never thought we’d have to figure out. Thanks 2020.

So I’m now in this with all of you and I wanted you to know I feel for everyone involved. Virtual learning is something that will be here for the foreseeable future unless everyone WEARS A GODDAMN MASK. Just put one on. If I can walk around the zoo when it’s 95 degrees out, sweating like a pig so that I protect everyone, so can you. I don’t want to hear that children don’t get it. You tell that to the families that have lost their kids to this virus.

In conclusion, as much as all of this is a pain in the ass, I know this time is special. I know that I get to have my daughter, my mini-me, my affectionate, bright, funny girl next to me all day. I know there are lot of people who don’t have that option and I realize the luck I have every day I get out of bed. Some days are harder than others. Some days we’re stretched paper thin. But some days you get hugs filled with love that come unprompted. And that’s when you know you’re lucky. – FemaleGG.

A blog/website where these happily married, 30-something parents of 2 little minions rant, rave, and speak in tongues. Raw, honest, and riddled with profanity. Get on board and let’s make The Ghost Generation awesome together!

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