Most of us would love to believe that Donald Trump is our biggest problem right now. If we could just get rid of his ass we’d be on our way to fixing all that ails our damaged society. Healing could begin, and we’d see ourselves on our way to America: The New and Improved. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if you believe that you’re fucking missing the point. Entirely.
It’s less true that Donald Trump is the problem than it is that he is merely a SYMPTOM of the problem…well, MANY problems really. Don’t give that fucking swine the sick satisfaction of being the “One Problem To Rule Them All”, he’s too small to have THAT much sway over the world. He’s the fucking skin tag of the earth, the greasy head of a giant pimple waiting to burst, the “oh no” moment before our entire civilization shits its collective cargo shorts. We have a vast expanse of problems and he is the result of our sickness, not the cause of it.
We allowed him to happen. It’s true, every single one of us has, in some way, aided and abetted the events that would ultimately lead to the election of King Shitbag. Did you pay attention to the header image of this post? Yep, a bunch of fucking cash. You wanna get to the root of nearly every problem we have as a society? There’s usually a trail of fucking money leading to it, with a few bibles peppered in for good measure too. Race, religion, and the almighty dollar. Mount Rushmore should be demolished and replaced with a giant gold monument of a klansman fucking a pile of cash because that’s what this country REALLY is. Don’t like it? Tough shit, the founding fucking fathers were a bunch of racist, elitist, white motherfuckers who escaped religious persecution so they could rape, murder, and RELIGIOUSLY PERSECUTE an entire civilization who already fuckin’ lived here. Deal with, this shit is why I don’t give a FUCK about the 4th of July. It’s a lie, it’s a joke, and if I were to go around waving a flag I’d essentially be co-signing genocide and that’s not on my moral fucking to-do list, thanks.
Hell, there’s verbiage in the constitution that essentially establishes that the goal of those pricks was to keep all the money and power with themselves cause the rest of us were too stupid to handle the glory. By the people, for the people? Go fuck yourself, cause it’s a filthy god damn lie. We have turned the entire world into a giant shitty mall. We have reduced our lives to a cycle of working to produce products, so we can sell products, consume products, and keep working to spin the great capitalist hamster wheel for all eternity. And here’s the rub, we’re ALL a part of it. Yeah, some of us might be all cozy and righteous in our clothes we only buy from a thrift store, eating our food we only buy from the local vegan co-op, listening to super-enlightened music made by super-enlightened people, all while drinking our locally-brewed, hate-free, $25 a six-pack craft beer of the week but guess what? Yep, you’re a part of the fucking problem too. Sorry, I hate to burst your fragile little ego bubble but you are. If you are using a product, consuming a product, selling a product, or doing just about fucking anything-somebody has suffered for it. We might not be talking sweatshop levels of dehumanization on all counts, but somebody had to work to make everything, and all of that “making” is part of the system. It’s all part of the system and the SYSTEM IS THE PROBLEM.
It’s built into our whole groupthink, ingrained into our upbringing, and nurtured by the media for a country that wants us all to keep on makin’ and buyin’ shit until we fucking die. Success, fame, six pack abs, perfect hair, perfect everything, it’s all shoved so far up our asses we can’t fucking see straight. It’s hard to fucking avoid the shit- even someone like me falls victim to it. At some point nearly every day I feel like I’m not in good enough shape, I’m not making enough money, I’m not “everything” enough – the world can really fuck with you if you let it in and some days I have an easier time closing the fucking shutters than others. Material, muscle, and the notion of “power”- THAT’S what we value, and THAT is why we have President Dipshit and his dipshit fuckin’ kids running the show. Pat yourselves on the back, hard.
I’ll make no bones about it, it’s tough to keep up with all the shit this world wants us to be, and even as a person who rejects most of this shit I deal with it all the god damn time. I’m a runner, I work out, and I’m in pretty decent shape- I’d like to be better but that’s just my lifelong self-loathing talking. But every time the fuckin’ $250-month CrossFit class goes running past my office in all their shirtless glory I want to put the barrel of something steel into my mouth and paint the fucking walls. It’s true ladies, a shitload of us dudes struggle with the same body-image shit that you do, the self-hate game ain’t gender specific by a long shot. God forbid I want to have a couple beers or a slice of pizza, I then spend hours mentally flogging myself like some kind of deranged Catholic martyr in full-on carb-craving repentance.
The CrossFit body, the Kardashian ass, the Influencer Income- it’s all fed to us constantly, shot up our collective ass via t-shirt cannon. The fact that we, in 2019, are still pleasantly surprised when a fucking fashion model looks like a NORMAL FUCKING PERSON should make us deeply concerned. Every move, every show, even the ones that attempt to be about “weirdos and nerds” are packed full of Hollywood lies. Everyone trimmed, tanned, and toned and if not? If not, they’re the object of comedy. Everyone pretending like they’re NOT laughing at the fat ones-but they are, some of you probably are too. We live in a world that tells us we’re just not QUITE good enough if we don’t have the perfect six-figure income and the perfect BMI, and we better look happy doing it on Instagram too you piece of shit. The less we talk about “influencers” the better, I don’t entirely feel like falling on that particular sword but for god’s sake FUCK THOSE PEOPLE. Bring on the hate mail, you won’t change my fucking mind. The fact that we have people sleeping under bridges while others make a living being on social fucking media all motherfucking day is something my brain will never be able to process. It makes me fucking sick, and it really should make everyone sick too.
It’s ugly, what we’ve turned life into, and in some way we’re all a part of it. I’m not sure there’s even much of a way around it either come to think of it. I’m guilty of it too, I’m writing this on a MacBook Air in between bouts of playing my Nintendo Switch, while I’m wearing the basketball shorts I bought from Target, drinking my Rockstar Energy Drink- see, the fucker on the soapbox is fucking “coining the phrase” just like everyone else. Thing is though, At least I KNOW what time it is. No matter what we do we are part of their machine, but if I can serve to be an annoyance, a spark, or at least just NOT AN IDIOT then I can sleep a little better at night. Or maybe that’s just the lie I tell myself, I don’t know-I’m not the one on trial here. 🙂
What I do know is this-we spend our days in jobs we hate, making money that’s never enough, for people that don’t give a FUCK about us, in a country that is founded by the very notion that most of us are nothing more than cannon-fodder- and I don’t see how we are so fucking mystified when we end up with Donald Satan Trump as Commander-in-Fucking-Chief. He’s the symptom of ALL the problems, the festering tip of the shitty iceberg, the net result of all our worst impulses splayed out on the table of history to forever remind us to hang our heads in shame at what we’ve allowed to happen.
I haven’t even STARTED on the other shit like racism- you guys have ENOUGH white people trying to show you how “woke” they are so I’ll fucking save it- but the point I’m trying to zero in on is that we are here because of our own greed & materialism. We are here because my niece calls my sister a cunt if she doesn’t get designer clothes. We’re here because we would rather have silicone housewives on VH1 than FUCKING MUSIC AND IT WAS A MUSIC FUCKING CHANNEL. We’re here because we’ve allowed breathing pond-scum like the Kardashians to become billionaires. We’re here because working on our traps and triceps is more important than working on the refugee crisis in Syria. Fuck the homeless, fuck the children, fuck everything- let’s just all fall of a cliff while snapping a selfie together, but we’ll look good doing it! Yay us!
I probably sound fucking angry and that’s because I AM angry, and you should be too. We’ve reduced ourselves to elevate celebrities, we’ve ruined and devalued love so we could distill it down to “swipe left, swipe right”, and we’ve burned our souls alive chasing down the mighty dollar, success, and “power”. The only thing that we should allow any “power” is OURSELVES. If there IS a God, he’s got better shit to do than worry about whatever the fuck we’re up to. Our leaders don’t give a shit about us, and the corporations and employers CERTAINLY don’t either. So we go around talking about “power” and we are constantly giving all of our own away. We allow people to shit on us all day long. Fuck, we even call people our “bosses”. What the fuck are we, machines? Slaves? What’s the fucking point of all this then? I don’t have all the answers, and I know I’m not special. I know I’m trying, and sometimes I think that’s the best any of us can aspire to. I’m trying to build something for myself here, so that even though it’s part of the larger “machine” at least I’ll be doing it for ME. I’m trying to raise good kids who will be kind grown-ups, I’m trying to be loving husband who is an equal partner with his wife, who elevates all of them with compassion and caring support. I’m trying to lose 20 pounds, I’m trying to- see, even the fucking GOOD shit can be exhausting.
Bottom line, I know I sound mad as shit and that’s fine. You’re not here for my “10 Tips To Make The Perfect Risotto” anyway, you fucking know what I’m about. My other half’s writing is a little less “fist-in-the-face” which wonderfully compliments mine and I think we round out The Ghost Generation to be something really great for anyone. She helps you grow, and I kick your ass out of complacency. Awesome. All jokes aside…
We are here, and it would be convenient to foster the belief that getting Donald Trump out of office will fix everything, but it won’t. The next person? They won’t either. I was in tears yesterday watching a video of Bernie Sanders talking about all of the things he would be doing when he gets into office, but it won’t happen-not all of it. And if it does, it’ll take a long time. This system has been fucked since inception, and the ones who want it that way have done a lot of “not so great shit” to keep it that way, so it’s not gonna just dry-erase it’s way off the whiteboard of America. That shit is gonna take a long time, but it can happen. It’s the tiniest of steps that any of us can take. We can choose to love ourselves and FUCK what we look like. We can choose to elevate each other instead of clawing over one another to get to success. We can choose to be fucking nice instead of treating people like shit. We can choose to STOP TAKING SO MANY GOD DAMN PICTURES OF OURSELVES and just be present. We can choose tolerance over ignorance. It can ALL be done, it really can. Getting Captain Commander Fart Face out of office is a small part of a much more deeply broken whole though, and all I’m saying is- we have a lot of work to do and we can only do it together.
“Bubbles are dope”- Me.