So I realize at some point we all had to go back to normal but it was nice while gas prices were like the above photo (Thanks, Kroger gas rewards!).

Isn’t it cozy!?
If you had an office like this at home, would you want to return to a windowless room that’s half the size?

In the past three months we’ve completed a room (my office, see above), cleaned the house every week, deep cleaned it every two weeks, kept on top of laundry, replaced the crosshead over the front door, landscaped both the front and backyards, exercised on a daily basis, slept a solid 8 hours every night, and spent more time with the kids. AFH and I have just been hanging out every night making each other laugh with no screens on while making sure we had weed in the house. It’s been a lifesaver.

I also watched all 23 Marvel movies in release order from Iron Man to Spider Man. RAD!

However, all of this is coming to an end on June 2nd as I am being asked to come back to the office. I realize that my cush office job is so much better than being asked to come back to a Starbucks or a Target where these hard workers are being exposed to IDIOTS who won’t wear masks (I had to get diapers yesterday at our local Target and I was one of the only people wearing one in the entire store outside of staff members). The worst part is that you walk past these maskless people and they stare you down indignantly, as if to say, “Go on, say something about it. It’s my riiiiiight as an Amurican.” Yep. It’s your right to either get the virus or spread this fucking thing so another wave will hit us this Fall. Have fun with that.

Anyway, back to my upcoming ridiculousness. I received the safety rules for returning to the office that we have to adhere to in this new climate. Wanna hear them!? Well, you have no fucking choice:

  • Standard stuff like you’ll be temperature tested upon entering the building, you must wear a mask, can’t sit in the cafeteria, etc. You know, common sense stuff.
  • Don’t come to work if you feel sick or are sick. Again, makes sense.

And this is where it starts getting weird:

  • If a coworker or visitor enters your immediate workspace, you must clean and sanitize the area before and after the visitor leaves. So, if someone is at my office door, I have to hold up one finger while I clean and sanitize my desk, then let them in, then wipe down everything again when they leave? Because that’s an excellent use of my time.
  • Do not come within 6’ of a coworker unless required to perform work. One would assume that if I’m in the office I’m working. So I guess that rule is thrown out the window?

But this by far is my favorite:

  • Meetings should be held virtually whenever possible.
  • (Second favorite): No meetings will be held with employees sitting closely.

Want to know what I do for a living? I guide people through the launch process of a product which means kickoff meetings and follow up meetings with all pertinent team members (which can be upwards of 20 people) and I’ve been doing that quite well via WebEx and conference calls while at home. So the above rules are basically saying, we want you to come into the office but we’re going to make your job harder than it’s been in the past three months and you’re basically moving from your home office to an enclosed office where you won’t interact with anyone outside of the phone. EXACTLY LIKE NOW.

And this, my dears, is exactly what’s wrong with Corporate America. Why do I have to be sitting in an office to do my job? Have I done a shit job over the past three months? I’ve been busier than ever (hence the drop in posts lately. Sorry.) and I’ve been able to start earlier and end later because my commute consists of walking from the coffee maker to my desk (a whopping 12 seconds). But I’ve been told I need to “show myself” in the office. Because then people will KNOW I’m actually doing work? It all comes down to trust and I think that’s why I’m pissed because my managers and everyone above them don’t trust us to the do the job that we do, even though we’re qualified and that’s why you hired us in the first fucking place.

In this digital age, we’re still proving ourselves like it’s 1998 and in my opinion the “presenteeism” mentality needs to fucking stop. But for now, I’ll just keep my mouth shut because at least I have a job to go back to. There are millions of people that can’t say the same. I would just keep that in mind if you’re not wearing a mask when you go out. When in doubt, follow our family rule:

Don’t be a dick. Don’t be an idiot.

It’s that simple. – FemaleGG

A blog/website where these happily married, 30-something parents of 2 little minions rant, rave, and speak in tongues. Raw, honest, and riddled with profanity. Get on board and let’s make The Ghost Generation awesome together!

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